Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Stupid English !! ~ Nice one ~ not my creation though !!

Poem on English:-

English is a stupid language English is a stupid language...

There is no egg in the eggplant.

No ham in the hamburger.

And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.

English muffins were not invented in England.

French fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted.

But if we examine its paradoxes

we find that Quicksand takes you down slowly,

Boxing rings are square,

And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig!

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing!

If the plural of tooth is teeth, Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth!

If the teacher taught, why didn't the preacher praught!

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what the heck does a humanitarian eat?

Why do people recite at a play and yet play at a recital,

Park on driveways and drive on parkways?

How can the weather be as hot as hell on one day and as cold as hell on another?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy

Of a language where a house can burn up as it burns down.

And in which you fill IN a form by filling it OUT.

And a bell is only heard once it GOES.

English was invented by people, not computers.

And it reflects the creativity of the human race.

(Which of course isn't a race at all)

That's why, when the stars are out they are visible, But when the lights are out they are invisible!

And why it is that when I wind up my watch it starts!
But when I wind up this poem it ends!!!!

4 Comments:

Blogger Suguna said...

yeah. this kind of a thing is because the same word in English has different meanings at different times. like "read" pronounced as "reeed" and sometimes " red ". but u wount find things like this in tamil. each and every word is unique. i think its because of the number of alphabets that has caused this confusion.

1:25 PM  
Blogger ~phobiac~ said...

@ sugs....

with u on that !!...Thamizh vaazhga !!

@ Morpheus

yeah u can look at it that way....by the way I am looking at it is this...

a donkey is a stupid animal.
It can be made to carry load and also do other work.
does that mean the donkey is an intelligent animall capable of doing work ??

well english is like a donkey...
it can be used by smart people to say smart things !

but basically flawed !

what say u ??

9:55 PM  
Blogger Amrita said...

aha! i have heard that one before a pretty funny post! I guess none of us would have found anything funny in the language until one reads such a post!

5:46 AM  
Blogger ammani said...

Unrelated comment. Thanks for coming by. Nice story, btw.

8:35 AM  

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